Jewish Divorce: The Get, the Beit Din, and the Agunah Crisis

The Document That Ends a Marriage

In secular society, divorce is a legal process — papers filed, lawyers hired, assets divided, a judge’s signature. In Jewish law, divorce is something more specific: it is the transfer of a document. A twelve-line, handwritten document called a get (גט), written by a scribe, delivered by the husband to the wife, in the presence of a rabbinical court.

Without this document, a Jewish marriage does not end. No matter what a civil court rules, no matter how long the couple has been separated, no matter how much both parties may want it to be over — without a get, the marriage persists under Jewish law. And the consequences of that persistence, particularly for women, can be devastating.

The get process reveals both the precision and the potential cruelty of a legal system that has operated for thousands of years. It is a process that works smoothly in most cases — and catastrophically in some.

What a Get Is

A get is a bill of divorce. The word comes from the Talmudic term for a document, and its use is specified in the Torah (Deuteronomy 24:1-4). The physical document must meet precise requirements:

Written by a sofer (scribe) — a trained scribe writes the get by hand, using a quill and special ink on parchment. The sofer must write it specifically for this couple — a pre-written or generic get is invalid.

Twelve lines — by tradition, the get contains exactly twelve lines of text, corresponding to the numerical value of the Hebrew word get (gimmel = 3, tet = 9; 3 + 9 = 12). The text is in Aramaic, not Hebrew, following ancient legal convention.

Specific content — the get contains the names of both husband and wife (including all known names and nicknames), the date, the location, and a declaration that the husband releases the wife from the marriage and permits her to marry another man.

Unique — each get is written fresh for the specific couple. It cannot be copied from a template. It must reference the specific individuals, their specific location, and the specific date.

The Process

The get procedure (seder haget) is conducted before a beit din — a rabbinical court of three qualified judges. The process is formal, deliberate, and follows a protocol that has been refined over centuries:

1. Both parties appear — the husband and wife come to the beit din. If one party cannot attend in person, a proxy (shaliach) may be appointed under certain conditions.

2. The sofer writes the get — in the presence of the beit din, the sofer writes the document. The husband formally commissions the writing.

3. Witnesses sign — two kosher witnesses (not relatives of either party or of each other) sign the get.

4. The husband gives the get to the wife — this is the critical moment. The husband takes the get in his hands and drops it into the wife’s cupped hands. She lifts her hands, receives it, walks with it (symbolizing her acceptance and possession), and then returns it to the beit din.

5. The get is cut — the beit din makes a small cut or tear in the get to prevent its reuse, and retains the document in its files.

6. Documentation — both parties receive a ptur (release document) confirming that the get has been properly given and received, allowing each to remarry.

The entire process typically takes about an hour when both parties cooperate. It is solemn, sometimes emotional, and surprisingly intimate — the final act of a relationship conducted in the presence of rabbinical authorities.

The Asymmetry Problem

Jewish divorce law contains a fundamental asymmetry: the husband gives, the wife receives. The get must be given voluntarily by the husband. A get given under absolute coercion (forced at gunpoint, for example) is invalid.

This means that a husband who refuses to give a get has extraordinary power. He can refuse indefinitely — out of spite, for financial leverage, or for any reason or no reason at all. And as long as he refuses, his wife remains married under Jewish law.

This asymmetry creates one of the most painful situations in Jewish life: the agunah.

The Agunah: A Woman in Chains

An agunah (עגונה, literally “anchored” or “chained”) is a woman who cannot obtain a get — either because her husband refuses to give one, or because he has disappeared and cannot be located (as happened historically in wartime and is now rare).

The agunah cannot remarry under Jewish law. If she enters a new relationship and has children, those children are considered mamzerim (born of a forbidden union) — a status that restricts their own marriage options under Orthodox law, carrying consequences for generations.

The agunah crisis is not hypothetical. Hundreds, possibly thousands, of women in Orthodox communities around the world are trapped in marriages they cannot leave because their husbands refuse to cooperate.

The husband who refuses a get is called a mesurav get (get-refuser). His motivations vary: some use the get as leverage in custody or financial negotiations (“give me the house and I will give you the get”). Others refuse out of pure vindictiveness. Some disappear entirely.

Efforts to Address the Problem

The agunah crisis has generated extensive legal creativity, activism, and debate within the Jewish world:

Beit Din Pressure

A beit din can declare that a husband is obligated to give a get and can impose social sanctions — public shaming, exclusion from synagogue honors, and community ostracism. In Israel, rabbinical courts have the legal authority to impose financial penalties and, in extreme cases, imprisonment on get-refusers. These measures work in some cases but not all — a sufficiently determined refuser can hold out for years.

Prenuptial Agreements

The most promising preventive measure is the halakhic prenuptial agreement (prenup), promoted by the Beth Din of America and organizations like ORA (Organization for the Resolution of Agunot). The prenup creates a financial obligation: if the marriage ends and a get is not given, the husband must pay a daily sum to his wife (typically $150/day) until the get is delivered.

The prenup has been endorsed by major Orthodox authorities and is increasingly standard in Modern Orthodox weddings. However, adoption in the ultra-Orthodox world has been slower.

The Conservative Movement’s Approach

The Conservative movement addressed the agunah problem through the Lieberman clause — a provision in the Conservative ketubah (marriage contract) that gives the Conservative beit din authority to compel a get. The movement has also used the concept of hafka’at kiddushin — retroactive annulment of a marriage — in extreme cases, a power that Orthodox authorities do not recognize.

The Reform Movement’s Position

The Reform movement considers civil divorce sufficient to end a Jewish marriage and does not require a get. This eliminates the agunah problem within Reform Judaism but creates complications for women who might later want to remarry in an Orthodox context.

Civil vs. Religious Divorce

In the diaspora, civil and religious divorce are entirely separate processes. A couple can be civilly divorced but still married under Jewish law (if no get is given), or religiously divorced but still civilly married (if no civil proceedings have occurred).

In Israel, the situation is different. Marriage and divorce for Jews in Israel are controlled by the Orthodox rabbinate. There is no civil marriage or divorce for Jews in Israel. A Jewish couple in Israel must obtain a get through the rabbinical court system to be legally divorced.

This gives the Israeli rabbinate significant power — and means that the agunah problem in Israel has both religious and legal dimensions. Women who cannot obtain a get in Israel are trapped not just religiously but legally.

The Weight of the Document

The get is a small document — twelve lines of Aramaic on parchment. But it carries the weight of a marriage, the authority of a legal tradition stretching back millennia, and the potential for both liberation and oppression.

When the process works as intended — both parties cooperating, the beit din overseeing, the sofer writing, the document passing from his hands to hers — it is a dignified conclusion to a relationship, conducted with solemnity and respect.

When it fails — when a husband refuses, when a woman waits years for a document she cannot compel — it reveals the dark side of a system that gives one party unilateral power over another.

The Jewish community continues to wrestle with this tension. The agunah crisis is not abstract — it is women, real women, waiting for a document that may never come, chained to a marriage that ended in every way except the one that matters under Jewish law. Finding solutions that work within halakha while protecting women’s dignity and autonomy remains one of the most urgent challenges in contemporary Jewish life.